"This is Ali. Obviously if I'm not answering, I can't fast-track your evidence bag. Offering to kiss my butt won't even work. You need me, leave a message. I'm a scientist, not a psychic, so you'll have to wait for me to get back to you. Cheers muchly."

[Please leave any message for Alicia or mun here]

You are NOT ALLOWED to explain ANYTHING unless someone comments you and asks.

Kissed any one of your LiveJournal friends? — Yes
Been arrested? — No
Kissed someone you didn't like? — No
Slept in until 5 PM? — Yes
Fallen asleep at work/school? — Yes
Held a snake? — No
Ran a red light? — No
Been suspended from school? — No
Experienced love at first sight? — No
Totaled your car in an accident? — No

( The rest... )

You there?

4.15. "Find a person who loves you for exactly who you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, the right person is still going to think the sun shines out your ass. That’s the person worth sticking with."
Juno

Co-written with paramedically

Andrew sat stiffly on the sofa as he watched Ali rushing around the apartment trying to do ten different things at once. After all the excitement and squealing and sloppy baby kisses that afternoon that came from seeing her Mummy and Daddy again after so long, Sunshine was exhausted and was fed, bathed, and sleeping soundly in her bed by six pm. But Ali was primed waiting for James to call her back so she could blast him about not telling her when baby Campbell was born. Andrew knew she was really hurt by it, and coupled withjetlag , it was manifesting into what Ali termed her Bitch Mode. It had been important for her to be there for James during the birth of his first child, and Andrew suspected she was now feeling even more shunned by her best friend because of it. It seemed to be just one thing after another with her friends. If it was Luke or Leila who had their first child on the way and didn't tell Andrew, he knew he would be pissed off too.

( Normally he would be sympathetic, and understanding... )

All muses referenced with permission and are from the princeton2nyc universe


Word Count | 1,240

LINK: Am I REALLY that much of an evil bitch that everyone has to continuously keep fucking secrets from me?!

LINK: Well fuck... there really is such a thing as too much sex.

LINK: The wedding reception was off to more than a perfect start, and not one of the guests had failed in jumping right into both the wedding and Halloween spirit. In every sense of it, it was a wedding reception, with the decor matching the church for the ceremony and a huge chocolate wedding cake standing proudly off to the side, which would be served with ever possible flavour of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream on offer as a side dish. Beside that, there was a large chocolate fountain in operation with every sort of fruit and sweets to select from for people to go back and forth all night if they wished. The meal had been lovely, the food proper soul food and none of the fancy shit with one carrot and drip of sauce on top of it. It anyone wasn’t already in a brilliant mood, the food certainly would have put them in it. The only people who hadn’t changed into fancy dress were the bride and groom who had mischievously decided to go to the party as a bride and groom because said bride refused to not get maximum benefit out of her designer wedding dress, already joking that Andrew was going to have to shag her in it while they consummated the marriage...

[Co-written by paramedically, notskywalker, asinthecity, doesntwaltz, aussielawyer, agentfraser, isabelowens, straight2point and agentsullivan]

ANDREW

Halloween 2009. October 31st 2009.

His wedding day.

Andrew had felt surreal when he woke up in Aiden and Pat's New York apartment that morning. It was like he was in a weird daze, and maybe having an out of body experience. He could hardly get himself to function correctly at first, almost bumping into a wall and doing a series of other stupid things when it was like his head wasn't attached to the rest of him. It made for a good laugh with all the guys, though, who wasted no time in pulling the piss out of him repeatedly over the course of the morning. He had been sick a few times, but he realised it was only because it was hard to get the nerves and excitement on an even keel. Riley gave him an injection of something to stop the vomiting, and then he felt much better, actually able to let himself enjoy the morning for what it was. Whilst, typically, the bunch of guys fell into time wasting activities such as watching the porn channel, smoking a couple of joints, and talking about tits and sex, Andrew fought not to just pace back and forth in the living room, grateful when Pat sat down next to him with a large cup of tea and a kind reminder that being married was the best thing ever. There was a lot of laughing and bad or crude jokes swirling around, with the inevitable farting competitions and tales of promiscuous pasts. It was a lot like Andrew's bachelor party a couple of nights before, only this time, Andrew could actually remember what went down. He had seen all of two minutes of video captured the night of his party with him as high as a kite on pot dancing wildly on a tabletop to a Britney Spears song for him to realise that forgetting was probably the best thing... and making sure that video never got out.

( Now they were at the church, and it was feeling more and more real as the minutes ticked over. Andrew's excitement dwindled into just sheer anxiety and nerves... )


Word Count | 7,822

Finally, FINALLY have everything done. With a few loose ends tied up, I can hopefully get some sleep tonight it preparation of the big day tomorrow. Still can't fucking believe that. My big day. I'm having a big day. Fuck me.

But first, updated Sunshine pictures!

( I can sympathise with her in this picture... )

By the time we got done, I was ready to join her in the backseat. Life is so much easier when you're a bub, and I was fucking jealous she could pass out like that while I had to stick to the wheel in rush hour traffic.

But it was all a result of getting this priceless shot by a professional photographer. I emphasise shot because this was the only decent pic we got. She spent the rest absolutely refusing to do anything cheesy or cute and sat in the pot plant he shoved her in with a frown on her face and the lip thing she does when she's about to burst into tears. I had to resort to drastic actions and sing and dance her favourite Wiggles song. I swear, I'm going to take Geoff out with his freakishly large dinosaur. Mummy maybe might have cried when she saw the photo, though. Next time, I'm asking Leila to take the photos.

( Still the sunshine of my life... )


[LOCKED FROM ANDREW]
And now to wedding stuff. Not an exhaustive list, but bits and pieces for posterity.

The dress by Oscar de la Renta, HERE

The shoes by Manolo Blahnik, HERE

Sunshine's dress, HERE

Bridesmaid dresses, HERE

The bouquet, HERE

Buttonholes for the guys, HERE

Honeymoon Down Under, HERE in luxury for a week in Tasmania, and then HERE in Sydney for a week so Andrew can catch up with family.


I think that's all for now.

Fuck, I'm nervous. I need tomorrow to be perfect. If just one day in my life can be perfect, please make it that.

LINK: Three days and counting...

LINK: Anyone books strippers for a Hen's Night on my behalf, and I will Full Monty them up the arse with my sharpest and best Monolos.

LINK: As she nursed her baby daughter protectively against her, stroking her fine hair with her fingertips, Ali realised that not knowing she was made to be a mother is exactly what made her a good one.

--> Passionate and Wild Sex Can Make You Conceive Faster

I call bullshit.

Ali took a small sip of chocolate milk she had poured into a champagne glass and stood staring at herself in the full length mirror in their room. She had been at work that morning, and she was now just in her slim-line pinstripe tailored business pants and light blue camisole she had worn under her shirt. She ran her hand over her upper stomach and then brushed it lower to nurse her stomach where the baby bump had been, which was now flat again. These pants wouldn't have fit in the stages of pregnancy she had reached, but she hadn't even had to suck her gut in that morning to get the zipper done up. She hadn't stopped to dwell on it at the time, but now that she was home and had the apartment to herself, she couldn't help but return to it.

( Unable to resist the urge, she set the flute of milk down and picked up a cushion from the bed, stuffing it up under her camisole to give the image that she was heavily pregnant and then looked at herself in the mirror again... )


Word Count | 2,446

So, after giving myself a migraine looking at bridal magazines and seeing so much tulle I want to barf, I figured, fuck it. I'm only doing this once. I'm going designer, baby.

Oscar de la Renta, you are my saviour.







This is as toilet-dolly as you're going to get me. Lucky I'm even wearing white. I'm hardly virginal, am I?

Physical symptoms all stopped now.

Heart still hurts. Feel empty inside.

Don't want admit I want to try again.


Fuck it. I'm going to have a cigarette.

LINK: As she flicked boredly through yet another cheesy wedding magazine, she blew her hair out of her face and wondered why the hell she couldn't just get hitched naked in just a really awesome pair of shoes.

Nothing like logging onto your journal and seeing your humorous pregnancy ticker telling you how far along you should be when you aren't pregnant anymore.

To go back to bed and hide from the world or to crack into that new tub of Ben & Jerry's with the super-sized pack of Hershey Kisses and Beaches on the TV?

That is the question.

Wedding magazines are going to have to wait.